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The Great Right Hope, by Mark Jackman
“Even the best vampires need a good smack...”
In north-east England, a monster has arisen. A vampire beast is stalking the Yorkshire
moors, mutilating and destroying everything in its path. The vampire elders realise
that the Firmamentum has cast its shadow on the world once more–a phenomenon which
happens every few millennia, where a human and a vampire are born ultimately powerful
and destined to oppose each other...
Sid Tillsley is a forty-six year old benefit-fraudster from Middlesbrough. He's an
overweight alcoholic, and also sexist, homophobic and a lazy git. But one thing sets
him apart from his northern brethren; he can kill vampires with a single punch.
Now, as you can imagine, killing a vampire with a big haymaker is pretty amazing.
After all, they are big hard bastards who can regenerate and stuff, and if anyone
could kill them, Dracula would never have lived up to his tough-guy persona. So,
when Sid inadvertently kills a vampire, whom he wrongly suspects as being a homosexual
dogger trying it on with him, the whole vampire world is thrown into a state of shock.
Suddenly, and very reluctantly, Sid finds himself the centre of human and vampire
attention. Some want to kill him, but others believe him to be the Bellator; the
one to fight the vampire beast.
That's all well and good, but Sid just wants to get pissed down the pub with his
mates, and, maybe, just maybe, end his two year drought with the ladies. Besides,
Sid has more important things to worry about. The benefit office are on to him, and,
if they see him scrapping, they'll know that his bad back and dodgy heart are all
a load of bollocks!
Forget “Twilight”, “The Great Right Hope” is the vampire release for 2009!
M J Jackman is one of the most talented, exciting, and hilarious writers to explode
onto the fiction scene in the twenty-first century,” was what Jackman hoped to read
in the papers after the release of The Sid Tillsley Chronicles. He hoped his mastery
of the written word and his elegant wit would bring celebrity status, which, in turn,
would bring fast women, hard drugs and liquor, and then slower, more understanding
women.
To date, he has successfully installed a decking area into his garden.
You can follow Jackman’s antics on Twitter (@Mark_Jackman) and Sid’s antic’s on Facebook
(search Sid Tillsley Chronicles)
Oh, and he’s gone back to university to be a “mature student.” And, no, he hasn’t
gone back to learn how to write (arsewipe!).
He gets an NUS discount.
Even his own characters would hate him.